Quality over Quantity

Would you rather have few but meaningful or a ton of so-so?

Of the many wise-isms I’ve learned from my Mom, her top sayings would be “quality over quantity”, which stands toe to toe with her other favorite, “Everything happens for a reason.”

Between the two, “quality over quantity” has an edge for me, maybe because it sounds more definitive. “for a reason” still remains nebulous, lacking in certainty but “quality over quantity” provides a reason behind my choice or decision - a benchmark for quality. The concept of “quality over quantity” also finds itself most useful when it comes to shopping, an activity that as you know by now, I immensely enjoy.

My Mom’s benchmark for quality was not stringent or prohibitive. She wasn’t a snob, and she didn’t care for luxury brands or designer pieces. What she often looked out for was craftsmanship and quality. She took great pride in making smart choices. She especially enjoyed buying good things at a discount - Le Creuset cast iron cookware and dutch ovens at TJ Maxx, organic cotton beddings from HomeGoods, her collection of tchotckes from estate sales and car boot sales.

To be fair, she wasn’t a total cheapskate. She often liked to say that she would always pick out the best or most expensive thing in a store, by her “eye and gut feel” alone. In the vernacular, she’d say with glee, “Mahal talaga ang taste ko!” (I really have expensive taste!). In fact, she didn’t mind spending for certain things if she knew they were comfortable, and would last her a long time. From her I learned that shoes made out of real leather don’t need breaking in, and that if they were expensive, it’s ok as they tend to outlive cheap, poorly-made ones. But she was frugal in the sense that she did not need a lot of a good thing. She taught me the concept of “cost-per-wear” such that say, you only have one strand of pearls, if it’s Mikimoto, you’re set for life. What I miss most back when she was alive, was how she liked to point out how “this old thing”, whatever it was that was still hanging around in her closet, such as her camisoles from Marks & Spencer that have been around since her London days (that’s about 20 years ago) still looks good and serves her well.

I do understand that quality is subjective though. The proverb “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure” didn’t simply materialize from thin air. It was borne out of someone’s observation that what seems precious to one person would be useless to another. For example, a vintage Coach bag made out of thick supple leather, beautiful and sturdy in it’s own right, wouldn’t mean much to someone who only collects Hermes bags (unless aforementioned Coach bag has sentimental value). So how do we figure out where our standards stand? Here’s where benchmarking comes into the picture.

My sister-in-law, who is a foodie, likes to say that when it comes to following food bloggers, trust the one who shares the same palate as you. I think the same goes when it comes to finding your style tribe or shopping posse. Look for someone who shares the same standards as you.

While chatting with my friend Rachelle, who has an eye for home objects that I would consider to be really really good, she too would wonder how someone would rave about something that wasn’t exactly good (to our standards at least). Was it borne out of politeness or does it really boil down to a matter of taste? I suspect it is the latter. Further, how do we know if we have taste and if we don’t, how do we even acquire taste? (Btw, we tackle this topic on @titaprojectpodcast, a podcast I co-host with @titakarrots. Give it a listen here!)

To expand our understanding of taste, Maxwell L. Anderson, former assistant curator at The Metropolitan Museum of Art and director of five museums including the Whitney Museum of American Art and the Dallas Museum of Art writes on page 59 of his book, “The Quality Instinct”,

“There are a fortunate few who are born into circumstances that make taste an automatic response, like breathing. They are raised in surroundings that exude self-confidence. This may be connected to inherited wealth and privilege, as when a child of European aristocrats is reared in a setting that has been vetted for centuries.

But being awash in finery can have the opposite effect for some people, allowing them to switch off their internal quality radar in those luxurious settings they take for granted. When they are launched into young adulthood, they're lost. We see children of privilege today parading on reality television shows, completely unencumbered by taste or good judgment of any kind.

There are others instinctually born with taste. You may be such a person, or you may have them in your life. They're much more fun to be with than those without. 

For others of us, taste is acquired through hard work. It is instinctive to search for quality - we do it in countless ways every day, in choosing what to eat, how to dress, where to shop, and how to spend our time. To the frustration of arrivistes seeking to display their unerring taste to the world, taste has no necessary connection to money."

My takeaway here is that good taste, while easy for those born with it embedded in their DNA, is not elusive. It may be cultivated through observation, exposure, experience and making considered choices. If you care to read the book, Mr. Anderson also instructs on 5 features to look for when it comes to Artistic Quality which I feel also applies outside of art:

1. Original in its approach

2. Crafted with technical skill

3. Confident in its theme

4. Coherent in its composition

5. Memorable for the viewer

Try this approach when observing random objects. I think The Sartorialist does a great job of looking at the most mundane things like a traffic arm and appreciating the quality and beauty of it.

Now on the subject of quantity, I suspect many of us have been programmed to believe that having plenty is the goal. Maybe because it signifies abundance? Or because there is comfort in knowing you won’t run out of something? Having a lot of a good thing is actually not a bad thing, but it also creates a problem of its own when you already start running out of space to store them, and more so when you don’t know when to stop buying more. Another issue with being quantity-focused is the tendency to use “but it was cheap” as an excuse. Which again, is not a problem until you reach a point where you sacrifice quality for quantity. When your choices detract you from living the life you deserve, especially if you’ve worked hard for it, then it deserves introspection. It’s like buying junk food when you know you need to eat healthy and have the means to buy organic fruits and vegetables. Treating one’s self poorly manifests a self-worth issue that urgently requires inner work. There are people actually who take pride in finding the cheapest things, just for the sake of being able to find things cheap. Which could be fun for a while but somebody pays for it in the long run - them because they have to buy something to replace it, or the environment, because that cheap thing just ends up in a landfill.

I once did a tidying talk for a company, and one of the participants asked how she could do a KonMari® fold if she didn’t have drawers. I suggested buying drawer bins from MUJI as I’ve had mine for years when a colleague, seemingly triggered by my expensive proposition, raised her hand and stood up to say, “You can find cheap ones in Miniso and you don’t have to spend a lot for the same thing.” Point taken, I agreed with her and told the participants there’s always something to find for every budget, they could even repurpose old boxes if they wanted to be eco-friendly. But what I did not bother to point out to the group was that a MUJI bin is not the same as a Miniso bin in terms of quality of plastic, ease of use and durability. Again, the classic case of clashing standards of quality. It was also a defining moment in my desire to understand the struggle between quality and price. Because in this case, to suggest a high quality, but relatively expensive objective could be deemed offensive by some. I guess the same way I find it offensive how Chanel could increase their price when the quality leaves less to be desired. Same same, but different.

This idea of quality actually goes beyond stuff and also opens up the discussion towards the kind of relationships we have with others and with ourselves. In this case, attributes go beyond the physical and boil down to values, emotions and interests.

Does your partner or do your family members and friends enrich your life and expand your mind? Are the experiences shared with them a source of joy and meaningful connections?

Is your home a sanctuary, where you feel safe and relaxed? Does it nurture you and renew your spirit?

When traveling and choosing a hotel, are you booking based on price, accessibility, comfort or prestige? Would you rather set a budget for lodging but splurge on food? When choosing where to eat, do you go for what’s familiar? Highly rated by critics? Or recommended by someone whose taste you trust? Taking the time to observe where we are willing to spend our time or money on tells a lot about our priorities and what we value in life.

As with practicing gratitude, when we look for and expect quality in every day moments, it’s what we will see more of, it’s what we will get. Make the quest for quality a daily practice and see how your life will change.